caveman: ugh
i was in the bathroom and i came back and my coworkers were telling me they saw three mice in my office me: er
were you in the bathroom this WHOLE time?
were you in the bathroom this WHOLE time?
caveman: yeah
me: that's 20 minutes
caveman: i had a lot of beef this weekend me: that's 20 minutes
me: maybe if you spent less time in the bathroom the mice wouldn't hang out for so long.
caveman: yeah
you're probably right
i'm so on edge now
me: they won't come back now that you're here.
caveman: they were literally crawling around my desk and shit
so nasty
me: did they poop on your desk?
caveman: i dunno
me: if there are little black things on your desk, don't eat them. they are mouse poop, not pumpernickel seeds.
caveman: i know
mouse dookers
me: you know i don't know why people hate mice.
they are actually pretty cute. and they're harmless i mean they don't wear red shorts and sing or anything but they're cute
caveman: maybe because they carry germs
me: haven't you ever heard of stuart little
caveman: ugh yes
me: or ralph, the motorcycle mouse?
they were super cute
http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/11onGks1y7L._AA160_.jpg
how can you be grossed out by that?
caveman: i'm not clicking on your link
me: really?
wow you are really afraid of mice
caveman: yes
me: but you're so tall
caveman: and rats
so?
me: they are the ones that are afraid of you
ok rats are grosser.
but still didn't you ever see ratatouille?
caveman: nope
i refuse
me: rats have feelings and dreams too
all they want is a place in life
not the ones in the subway though...just the ones in restaurant kitchens.
3 comments:
Holy nostalgia. I had totally forgotten about the Mouse and the Motorcycle, but I think that was my favorite book in like second grade or something.
This "caveman" guy sounds like a real winner. I'd consider getting a restraining order against this freakshow. Or maybe a refill on his Paxil prescription.
Well shit. The rats in the subway are hardcore. Their "house" vibrates all day, they have to scavenge through garbage just to meet half of their daily recommended calorie intake, and yet they still manage Grow Strong Like Bull, Da. If I didn't value my immune system, I'd give 'em a dap and share a six pack of Coors with 'em.
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